Village Hotel Edinburgh Review

2 New Members of the Village People


Whenever Scott and I plan a trip of any kind, it is never as easy as a rock down to Electric Avenue. Regardless of how much us smooth criminals plan in advance, there’s always a big, crazy kangaroo that kicks something stressful in our direction. During this Edinburgh trip, this kind kangaroo kicked Aberdeen traffic, tugs and knots in the down do and some rather unruly windscreen wipers.

The ruthless rain proved a danger zone as we passed a good few accidents which took with it queues and standstills. No matter how much I attempted to display a swan like exterior, I looked more like a delicate duck with feathers in all directions and wings flapping like a saltire.

By the time we arrived in Edinburgh, I needed 7 drams, 2 gins and a bottle of Gallo. Because, really, what could be better than booze therapy after a shift on the A90? I’ll tell you what, a warm welcoming at the Village Hotel in Edinburgh is a pretty good start. I felt like Joseph except I didn’t have to knock on a heap of doors, just endure the ruthless rain and the taunting traffic to get to the sexiest stable going.

Hello, is it me you’re looking for?

Yes, yes it is. The Village Hotel in Edinburgh boasts a sassy exterior and an inviting interior, complete with a grill restaurant, bar, spa and even a Starbucks. There is also a state of the art gym but unfortunately I needed to wash my hair so couldn’t fit that in…

It’s like they knew we were coming, all this effort, just for us? It couldn’t be more appreciated after our stressful stint on the road from bonnie Aberdeen. What would you want after a long journey in the howling rains of Scotland? Comfort, a beautiful bath and a night of dirty dancing planned. For the record, I’m referring to a Dirty Dancing tribute night and not just Scott and I getting dodgy with our dance moves!

I’m coming up, I want the world to know

I don’t think I could feel any more in the clouds, literally, we were given a room on the 4th floor and if you can see the Village Hotel from your home then close your curtains. If you can see us then we can see you and our dance moves are far better. I love a room with a view as I am a nosy madam and I will hang out at the window for longer than necessary.


The decor in the Village was classy, modern and very comfortable. Unfortunately this has given Scott some ideas though and I feel an upcoming trip to IKEA and B&Q is on the cards. However, if like I, you don’t want to redecorate, you should probably check this place out at some point as it is perfect for a good nosy.

The room even had a desk, it’s like they thought I would be working during my stay, which I am, obviously… Should you for any reason not be needing to make use of the desk then it doubles up as a brilliant dressing table. Just an observation obviously…

You need to lay low

The most important part of any hotel room is the carpet, joking, it’s the bed and the bed in the Village was packing some serious comfort. Exactly what this little lady was needing and yes it is completely acceptable to relax in bed for half an hour at 5pm. Joined by TV and Sky if you please. It’s age…

Speaking of age, us bloggers need a good scrub up every so often, especially when we are going to watch a man who is proud to tribute Patrick Swayze. He could be a love man and our eyes could be hungry, let’s not take any chances here..

Thankfully, the Village must of known what I was thinking, as they set up a cracking bathroom in the room giving me an excellent place to replenship and smell like roses. I noticed while I was there that they use ESPA products. ESPA products smell incredible, they pride themselves on offering a sensory experience and they really do. ESPA mention on their site that their message is inner calm and natural beauty. The natural beauty part could take a little longer than planned but the inner calm part definitely rubbed off on me (literally).

Nobody (and I mean nobody) puts baby in the corner

Notice how I have made a few references to Dancing in this review? Well that’s because we are away to spend our Saturday night at a Dirty Dancing tribute complete with food and fizz. This will be the second time that Scott has seen a Dirty Dancing show but yet has still not seen the film. An absolute offence which says more about him than I. Watch this space…

I’m moving in

The Village Hotel is more of a mini town than a hotel and I guess that’s where they get their name. There is literally everything that you could need at hand and the place is huge. You don’t even need to take a taxi from the bar to the restaurant to the pool (again, a reasonably acceptable schedule) as they have covered the lot.

If any of my future bridesmaids are reading this, which you better be as I have most likely not given you an option then this place would be a great location for a hen do. There’s a spa for you all to pamper me in, a bar for you to booze me up in and a whole host of tribute nights coming up including Abba, Take That and Rod Stewart. Feed me enough cocktails and I would probably not know it was a tribute. Everyone’s a winner and the winner takes it all…

Public announcement

Our stay at the Village Hotel was complimentary because we are good guys. You can book your room here



The Chief.